MARRIAGE MANIA

"Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere" - Groucho Marx.

Exactly my point!

Lately, my friends and acquaintances (of either gender), have been slowly but surely succumbing to the marketing wiles of these mushrooming matrimonial sites, social/ parental / peer pressures and sell by date college romances (not exactly in that order).

Yet, bravely I stood with a trusted few, guarding the haloed frontiers of bachelorhood. Grieving (at times sniggering at) the vanquished.

So while my "online albums" (on those dime for a dozen social networking sites) bore photographs of philandering boys on the beaches of Goa, “their” albums had beautiful wedding and honeymoon snaps.

I wish to clarify that I do not detest marriage. It is as sacred an institution as can be (so I’ve read). But for everything in life, there is a certain age (though there are always exceptions to the rule). Else 8 year olds would be driving just because they love fast cars. You need to be matured enough to peep through the veil of initial thrill and recognize the hazards which lie ahead.

Plus, marriage is akin to bungee jumping or sky diving. You sign a consent form before you actually take the plunge.

Finally when my impatience hit the roof on account of my friends’ “suicidal” tendencies, I sent a mass email to all the vanquished. It had a simple question. “Life is to be enjoyed when you are young and free. So for God’s sake, WHY ?”

I got a variety of responses mostly from the US, Bangalore, Pune and some from Mumbai. The tone of the response depended on the person’s emotional proximity to me, their gender and their reasons for taking the plunge.

The honest ones (exclusively males) were pretty forthright with their reply. Something on the lines of Joseph Barth saying, “Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up”. I totally agree. Next time do something macho in your teens so that you won’t have to take such drastic steps.

The ones who had "arranged marriages" quoted something on the lines of Tom Mullen’s, “Marriages blossom when we love the ones we marry”. As an antithesis to this, I just remembered Samuel Johnson’s saying, “Marriage is the triumph of hope over experience”. Amen!

My creative friends from the Oscar Wilde school of thought responded as the great man would have. “Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence”. No wonder we get along so well on most counts.

But my favorite reason came from my really close bosom buddies (of either gender). It was on the lines of “now at least we get laid each night”. “With the same partner”, was my sardonic remark. “Not always” was their surreptitious reply. Case rested. Meet you in hell.

One last juvenile dig at my “hit list” (excluding my haloed bosom buddies of course). One last email which pleaded, “GET A LIFE!”

One unanimous response from them “GET A WIFE!”

Misunderstandings

WHY AM I SO MISUNDERSTOOD AT EVERY WALK OF LIFE ?

Why am I considered "intellectual" when I'm genuinely allergic to anything/ anyone with a hint of intelligence ?

Why is my silence mistaken for sagacious pondering ?

Is it because of:

1) My "techi" B.E (Mech) degree which I reluctantly reveal when prodded about my educational qualification ?

2) My "above average" grades I managed to garner (solely by hook on most counts and by crook very rarely) at vital junctures of life ?

3) My omnipresent spectacles which try to hide my sleepy eyes ?

4) My unkempt hair and facial foliage ?

5) My unnecessary pedantic outbursts because of the wikipedia hangover ?

6) Emancipation of my emotions through poems and short stories ?

7) My ability to prevaricate out of complexities ?

8) Remembering a thousand faces (most of whom I wish to avoid) ?

9) Being politically correct and precise with my information ?



HMMMMMM COME TO THINK OF IT......MAYBE I AM SMART !

KEEP THE COMPLIMENTS COMING IN GUYS !!!!!